Lying Through Her Fangs
The blazing Georgia heat hummed against my heavy blackout drapes, and I woke up with a better feeling than when I’d had fallen asleep. In the hours of oblivion, my dreams had reworked the scenario over and over again with only one outcome—I had to work some magic or I was going to have more egg on my face then a blind pastry chef.
When I tossed the brocade covers off of me, Bits meowed her complaints as my movements roused her from her chosen spot.
“If the guys knew I had you, one of them would be closer to winning the bet on when I’ll become a crazy old cat lady,” I said to the cream colored Scottish fold. She’d been an impulse buy, though Christianna had said a fur stole would have made a better warming companion. Her first glimpse of Bits caused her to laugh until pink tears seeped out of her perfectly winged eyes.
“Bits? Is that short for Kibble and Bits or just Bits of her ears are left?”
The cat raised her voice at my crazy cat lady comment spread out as if it was her bed instead of mine? What does she do to show she’s sulking?]. Knowing she wouldn’t let me make the bed until she stopped sulking, I left it unmade, against my inner neat freak.
Now that my robe was on, I could finish the task now that Bits had vacated her spot on the bed. Once the smoky blue duvet was properly in place, my pillows were perfectly settled; I headed the restroom so I could make myself presentable for my possible date with destiny.
I nudged my cat’s miniscule ears as she daintily ate her food and smirked. The bar goers had, in fact, won—I was an old cat lady. But, I’d fallen for her the minute the breeder had posted her picture and had the carrier with trimmings purchased the very next night.
After I picked her up, I’d whispered, “One of us will be outliving the other one but if you’re the only person to successfully live with me then welcome to my nightlife.”
The coffee shop would be first as maybe a frappuccino would keep me cool as I window shopped for Could Be Mr. Right. You’d think a lady such as myself would not be nervous about something like this but maybe I’d adopted that habit from being around humans this long. I placed my order and surveyed the men in the small building. Among the pike sippers and muffin eaters were three men in my age group. Two were accompanied by others and one table debated culture while the other, failed . The conversation was more heated at the relationship table so I waited for my caffeine closer to the culture club.
“Order ready for Ms. X.” The teen hurried to start making another drink for the line quickly developing behind me.
The last time Christianna had come here with me, she had told them the orders were for Lady X and Honeydew. That had been after an all-nighter were we had made our own pub crawl through Decatur and she’d gotten phone numbers galore. The only difference with her getting numbers was that she was saucy enough to ask the gentleman to write them on her body for her to look over later.
Frap in hand, I chose a seat in an empty corner, where I could check out the possibilities. Anger radiated off one good looking guy in the relationship group and I instantly took him off the list. I didn’t have the energy to waste on the constant compulsion I’d need to use to cover that character default. A dirty blonde metrosexual in the corner eyed me over his phone but went back to whatever had him intently gazing at the small screen.
A Latin man nearby discussed the latest fashion of women dressing more mature than they should at early ages. The woman next to him stated how old fashioned he was. It was entertaining and worth a few more moments of listening just to see if she beat him down with her feminist point of view.
“Are you waiting for someone?” a male voice drowned out her response.
I’d picked up on the metrosexual slipping closer to me as he used the excuse of getting a napkin to be in front of my table.
“Possibly,” I murmured as my eyes staid in front of me as I hoped he would say something intriguing.
“Seeing that you were alone and I’m having writer’s block, it didn’t hurt to stretch my legs for a minute.”
A smile quirked at my lips and I glanced at him. He was attractive but I couldn’t read him. Strange. His aura was a muddy forest green, which usually meant insecurity and lack of responsibility. Not a great first impression.
He took the seat opposite me without invitation, and leaned over. “But seriously, are you waiting for someone because I could be that someone.”
Points for twisting the cliché pick up line. I perused his mind as he stared at me.
“Tell me how you would fit an order that may have been placed?” I quipped as I waited to be impressed.
“ Hmm, no matter the order, a nine inch tool always fits the bill.” Then I saw it, what he had been doing when I’d waltzed in for my frap. It was a bevy of silicone enhanced young ladies in an orgy. On loop.
“You’re a porn addict and nothing of mine will be for your viewing. Have a nice day and wash your hands.”
Grabbing what was left of my happy frap, I made the quickest exit possible for a vampire trying to act human. My retreat left vapors. Door number two HAD to be better than this.